I started growing more and being more dedicated, now I was confident, not deceiving anyone, without any masks... I was just being myself. It was my utmost pleasure to serve God. I was there in almost every meeting in the evening, I sat with the people asking what they needed prayer for and placed their names in my little prayer book. I counseled youth, I gave a lot of effort for my tribe to grow... basically I was giving my all for God.
Time went by, many people kept asking me, "Why aren't you an assistant yet? Join the assistants course. You'll start getting prepared to become a collaborator." I decided to participate not to become an assistant but to learn more. I joined the course 6 months and I learned so much. But, I wasn't raised as an assistant. I continued doing what I loved doing, not caring if I was an assistant or not.
But something started to change within me, I disregarded it at first, but the feeling kept coming back. The desire to become an assistant came after being 2 years within the church. I was even already dreaming that I was wearing the uniform... lol... But my only concern at that time was not letting anxiety take over. I was only 14 years old and still a kid, but, with a mature mind.
The pastor in that time had been there for around 2 years and some months in my church in Cubatão, he was Pastor Roberto Texeira.. He knew me, but he was transfered and I thought... Now, the new pastor will have to know me and I'll have to join the course once again. But, that same week I spoke to God, my life was in His hands. The pastor was in the church for around a week, and I remember that during my lunch hours, I went to church to clean the restrooms. I was also cleaning the service room, as I always did, I loved being in church, being able to clean it... I was there and the pastor or assistants would call me for something, I felt so useful, even if it was to go look for something in the store, pharmacy, etc.
I remember it was on a Thursday, I was there like always during my lunch hour, I had only seen the pastor for the first time on Thursday because he had done the service. I was sweeping the church and he kept observing me. I continued cleaning, a few seconds later he comes towards me and my heart started beating faster... He asked me, "Are you an assistant?" Lol, I wasn't expecting that question. I responded, "No pastor, I'm only in the youth group." Then he told me, "Okay, from now on you're an assistant. I will be leaving soon but I'll let the other pastor know that I raised you as an assistant." I was numb. I didn't expect this, I saw God in that moment raising me up... It marked my life.
On that same day came the other pastor came, It was Pastor Roberto again lol... I went and spoke to him, and it was confirmed that I was an assistant... I couldn't believe it.
In that moment I realized that when we let God act, He acts without any explanation. He knew my heart's intention, and that what I did was for Him. He knew that it didn't matter to me how long it would take for me to become an assistant. Even if I didn't have the title, I was already an assistant. Many times there's a lot of people who have in mind, "When I'm an assistant, it's then that I'll start doing things." They don't realize that the one who raises them up is themselves.
One time I heard this phrase: "There's a lot of assistants who are not servants and a lot of servants who aren't assistants."