Thursday, October 6, 2011

Seeking until further notice (Part 1)

My times as an assistant were moments that'll last a life time. It was a time where I needed to be ready to learn, no matter the cost. When God calls you, you need to show Him that you are chosen. I was only 15 years old, single and still with a lot of maturing to do... deep inside of me I had an assurance that I was chosen to serve, to be a different kind of assistant and it all depended on me. 

I was in the faith... I went to church everyday, it was a pleasure to be there. When I went to the meetings I didn't just go to go, I always went with a purpose of blessing someone, counseling, and if a person came to speak to me, it had to be God Himself speaking to them. That has always been my faith, I didn't want to be just one more. If I was raised as an assistant, it had to be a privilege for me, not a routine. I always made sure to do things for God, to serve Him in a way that wouldn't become a habit. I would never miss any meeting at church, if something was needed, I was there I didn't mind sacrificing.

Back then everything was fine... actually things were pretty calm for a person who was sacrificing, being dedicated and being faithful. Wouldn't you agree?

And then... our pastor changed. I didn't know him. We had an assistants meeting, some organizing was done because there was a lot of us... assistants were needed to work in some meetings... I remember that he (the pastor) made it clear, that if we were here with all of our heart, we had to do our part, we had to be responsible and do our part as an assistant. If for some reason it wasn't like that, God couldn't count on us. He also added, if there were assistants that were serving just to be assistants, it'd be better for them to give up their position. God would end up revealing, and if someone failed to fulfill their responsibilities and didn't have a good excuse, they would be put down until further notice.  

I really liked this new direction, it was the right thing. If we were truly there, we had to be servants of God and help people, being responsible. A few weeks passed, I began seeing assistants stop being assistants, they began having to seek again and no longer wore the uniform.

"My God!" I thought, "What is going on?!"

It was God working, He knew what He was doing. Little did I know the same thing would happen with me, lol. I didn't go to church on a Wednesday where I usually assisted, I remember it was because I had gone to work to another city and wouldn't have time to be back on time, so I participated of the service in the city I had gone to work at (note: I didn't inform the pastor, I only informed him the next day). When I went the next day to speak to him, I explained and apologized about what had happened. He stayed silent just looking into my eyes – no reaction whatsoever.

After a few minutes, the pastor tells me, "It's better for you to only seek now, don't wear the uniform anymore, don't go to the kids zone, don't go into the assistants room, from now on you'll only go to the service room and back to your house... If you want, you can still evangelize."

Wow. It came out of the blue... I wasn't expecting this at all. I had not sinned, I hadn't done anything so why did I have to stop being an assistant? Look, I didn't understand what was going on... I was speechless. It was a complete shock to me, I left that day stunned.

"What's going to happen now?" was the first thing that came to my head.

I loved doing what I did. Just because of that? I cannot believe this. Well, I went straight home that day... with a bunch of thoughts in my head. But, do you want to know what I did?

I'll let you know tomorrow... and you're going to see how God works, no matter what the situation is, He wants to see that you'll be faithful to your word. If I truly wanted to make the difference, here was my opportunity. It took a little bit of time for me to notice though.

Read Part 2...

"A servant that has the same characteristics as God does not only do His work, but overall, His will."