Saturday, February 19, 2011

The first love and the imbalance

When I got freed and then was baptized in the Holy Spirit, a great love for souls was born within me. There was a transformation inside of me, I was in awe at what God was doing in my life. I was so marveled that I had an imbalance.

At 13 years old, before knowing the Lord Jesus, I had problems in school and stopped studying twice. And then the imbalance came this time of always wanting to be at the church helping and I stopped studying once again. I wanted to be in church every day. In that time I was part of the youth group. I evangelized, cleaned, participated of the services... I even took my backpack with food to eat, this was my first love.

Only now do I understand that I didn't do the right thing. I ended up giving a bad testimony to my family back then. Even now, I have dificulties just because I stopped studying. I know that it's really important to be in that faith, the first love, but we need to have a balance. This is also necessary for those who want to serve God on the altar. I have dealt with this imbalance and its revolting! I've been in the USA 3 years and had to learn spanish when i first got here... I have to confess - it was very difficult. I had a lot of trouble learning this new language.

The worst part for me was when we had meetings and people came up to me for counseling, back then we didn't have many assistants, and several times the people came to me crying and I understood nothing. It was very frustrating for me, those were horrible moments. I felt like nothing because I couldn't speak or understand them. But with struggles and perseverance I learned. I still regret having stopped studying in that time though. Now I am learning english, because in this moment I'm involved with the youth group.

There are days I feel like I'm going crazy... studying, struggling to learn, and also sacrificing half of my day to go to school. Sometimes I feel like quitting, those thoughts come "you have so many things to do in the church and you're here in school wasting time." I then remember the reason why I have to understand the youth, I need to help them. And once again I'm in this situation.

If I didn't have this imbalance in the past, I wouldn't have to be, at 27 years of age, in school. And the worst thing is knowing that the work of God needs women and men of God that know another language. Sometimes we have a church and no one who speaks the main language. That's why we need to have a balance. If you have the desire to do the work of God, don't limit yourself. As of now as a youth, assistant, etc, finish your schooling, try to learn as much as possible because in the future it will be really useful. This as well is doing the work of God.

God wants to use us in an extraordinary way... But we cannot limit ourselves. Take advantage of the opportunites now so that you won't regret it later.

"A servant that has the same characteristics as God does not only do His work, but overall, His will."